I look to Seth Godin for my daily inspiration. I love what he says. I base so much of how I run ActiveRain on his suggestions. Yet today I read a recent post of his and thought it was stupid. I find 1 out of maybe 100 of his posts unrelevant or dumb, so needless to say most of his stuff I get great value from.
But for this one post that I didn't like, the thought crossed my mind to shoot Seth an email letting him know that he missed the mark, however I've never written to thank him for the other 99% that are awesome.
Why are we wired this way?
I agree...it's so easy to forget all of the great things people do for us and to concentrate on the one area they may fall short (or in this case, the ONE POST). Not sure why we are wired that way, but do think it's wise to be less judgmental and more appreciative of what other do. Only good can result.
When I was in the restaurant business, we taught our managers - give bad service, the customer will tell ten people in the next ten minutes. Give them great service, they will tell ten people in the next ten days. Bad news or disappointing news seems to travel like the speed of light - perhaps we find secret pleasure in spreading bad disappointing news?
Jonathan - How about adding a link to his post so we can see how stupid it really is. (whoops, did I say that out loud?). Okay, everyone... admit it- you all want to see it.
Jonathan~ Like Lynn said above- maybe we do want to see what post you are talking about that you just didn't like.....
http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2008/08/thoughts-on-pop.html
Seth hits home runs regularly. I think he only hit a single here.
But if you read blogs, you gotta be reading Seth's Blog, IMO.
Jon.... a very good point. I think as human nature, we try to find fault before we applaud someone for something good. As a manager, I try to compliment sometimes more than I should. But if someone does something stupid, they should be told. I guess it depends... and yes, I would like to see this blog, just to get an idea. thanks
This post is stupid ;)
Don't mind Paul. He's still trying to discover Localism.
Hey Paul...
What's Localism?
It's a little bird, Paul. Geez. I've told you that like 4 times already.
We had a rule in our family when the kids were growing up that for each negative comment you had to "pay" the person you were being negative toward three positive comments. I'm not sure it made a difference, but we tried. Next time Seth inspires you, I bet you remember to tell him so.
Well, I liked the popcorn story....so there.
And yours was off too.... but I liked it too. :)
I wonder that myself some days. I learned how to give praise for accomplishments when I became a parent. It was easy with my boys. However, it isn't as instant with colleagues or team members. The last couple of years I have really tried to make it a priority. I guess I learned how important it was to people when I was working in escrow/title in Calif and found what a thankless job that is. Made me really realize how much a thank you means to people.
Jon - You are starting to act like a consumer. You have just seen the reason that customer surveys don't work. We have been programmed to find fault instead of being positive. Turn on the news and try to find something positive, it might take a long time.
Go for a run and you will have a completely different perspective!
I'm just sayin'...
It is true that most humans love to hear the negative side of things and so many love to add their "2 cents." From all the news & tabloids out there humans really are voyeurs into other's lives. I think it occurs because we are all so different and we want to see what other people deal with on a daily basis.
Great post - I was even checking to see where I could find the article. Good way to learn alot about our automated reactions or just our human nature. But it makes us realize that we have to first be aware and then do something when frustration leads us over to the negative side.....stay positive!
Jon- I think we are all wired like that...ready to send a mistake, but slow to congratulate...is it the competitiveness we possess?
YOU are wired that way, but I am still controlled by those little strings ;-)
Hi Mandy :)
Hi Jenn :)
RainMaker...
It's that whole free will thing :)
P.S. There's probably folks out there that didn't think Seth missed the mark.
TLW...ROAR!
You know, I think I have sort of a different perspective. When we come across someone who we feel inspires or educates us in ways that other people just don't, and they do it consistently, we tend to get to the point where we expect it from them all the time. That's why we really notice when they are off the mark. It stands out for us in a way that the "good stuff" is normal.
As far as not giving compliments, we are so used to keeping our praise to ourselves that it has become out of the norm to let it out. That's why people in the Rain like Duane Marlink stand out the way that they do. Because they consistently give praise where praise is due the way we all should. They embody the way we all wish we could be. Does that make sense?
~Renae
IMO it comes from the need to see patterns, and flaws in the patterns, as a survival technique... a "what's wrong with this picture" skill. If everything is wonderful and perfect, we give it no thought, all is right with the world and we can drop our defences. If something is wrong, it alerts the brain to activity. So we seek flaws. Now we need to evolve beyond that.
too funny...we are weird creatures and like the media we quickly focus on the negative and leave the postitive stuff for last.